In an effort to mentally prepare for raising a female in this forsaken age of the internets, I over analyze YouTube videos and everything my more perverted male friends have to say. I am scared to death with each passing comment, article, and general popular belief that girls both young and old are in danger of becoming male pawns.

A simple search for Arizona State University on YouTube in hopes to bring up Daniel Tosh’s standup at the university yielded this wonderful video:

It looks like a rap video! No child of mine is going here to chill like 50 Cent on my dime. Unless we have a boy. This daughter thing has me worried and she isn’t even here yet!

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