Sure, “teenage years” is the accepted standard for when Society lets its daughter date young lads in her school. Good for you Society, you determine what happens with your daughter- never let people make the decisions for you. If it weren’t for you I’d never get the practice of screwing enough girls over to finally get it right with my wife. Heck, dare I say that “Society’s daughter was the mistake I needed to become a man”? Aye, tis a saying I shall be using like many a man out there.

Then I think back to the loser I was as a teen. And the crap I fed and equally got back in the few relationships I had. The sneaking around. The crap the daughter tells Society so that she may hang out the extra hour. Bullocks. And I am to follow Society when raising my daughter?

Heck no! Future baby girl, if you’re reading this from your room in the tower which I locked you in, know that I meant well and ’twas Society that made me think twice about allowing you to date boys in your teens. And don’t think I’m stupid- that high tower I locked you in doesn’t mean you can let down your long hair for some dude to rescue you. Nay, you’re getting a weekly trim from the hairdresser to ensure you keep a modern look with no long hair to let down to any alleged price who looks like some dumb hipster with his skinny jeans.

Society, you lose man. I am not going to give in to what you and the others allow on TV shows. Kids are too dumb today and in my day to make any good decisions. Also, Society doesn’t involve himself with a say in his daughter’s clothing until it’s too late. I’m getting in this ASAP. I already got a line of clothes lined up – yea, that’s right. I’m picking out my daughter’s undergarment: