I thought it would be from falling asleep mid-walk to work after all the lack of sleep. Perhaps I fell asleep during the boss’ meeting and he gets so angry that he throws the projector past my head and the power cord yanks my glasses as it whizzes by leaving a little boo boo on my face. The baby maybe starts dozing off in my arms while I’m already knocked into slumber and as I stir to save Baby Rangirl’s head from whiplashing I hit my arm against the startled cat’s teeth and I suffer a scratch.

Regardless of what my first injury is from being a father, I expected it to be the result of the lack of sleep. Turns out my first injury was due to us keeping the light off so as to not disturb the baby at night. I was walking up the stairs with the baby’s bottle and I stubbed my clumsy big toe against a step. Days later and I’m still in pain. Was it because of no lights? I’ve walked those steps in the dark many times before so as to not disturb the slumbering wife. It could be chalked up to daddy-brain and my body doesn’t know how to adjust to my zombie brain.

In any event, ouch.