We tried our first attempt at a beach day with Baby Rangirl recently. Why shouldn’t she get used to the sand? Daddy Ranman doesn’t swim despite my parents coming from a beach-loving country and growing up literally blocks from the community pool. Plus, I help fulfill the stereotype that dark folk don’t swim. With our baby being half non-dark, I assume half of her has the natural instinct to hit the water.

We chose the wrong day to hit the beach. It seemed decent exiting the house, but when we exited the car at Jones Beach’s parking lot, we were afraid the baby would get carried away in what could be classified as hurricane-like winds. Baby Rangirl struggled to breath comfortably as she gasped for air every so often. Plus, it was cold. At least Baby Rangirl could garner heat from her mother’s bosom while being carried to the sand storms on the beach in her Bjorn baby carrier…what bosom doth mine own body get to lean on? Sigh, but I can’t get angry at Baby Rangirl- dumb daddy forgot to pack pants to go along with the 42 onesies in the diaper bag. She had to use our beach towels to stay warm.

In the end we hit a nearby park which proved to be as cold as the beach. Is excessive exposure to the elements considered child abuse?