Look, I’m gonna complain about things which most parents out there have already “been there” and “done that”. But it’s all Greek to me, bro. It’s all alien. No comprende, hermano.

But this issue was just common sense that I forgot to apply: I forget that my daughter is growing. Seriously. I see the kid day in and day out- more so these days being out of a job- and I forget her ability to expand everything. That includes her spray zone at every end.

I had to throw 2 changing pad covers in the wash within 3 days of each other because I misjudged the range on this girl. I mean, she’s a girl! No hose to spray! But alas, she’s eating more and growing. It was only a matter of time when the shield of a loosely held diaper would need to bumped up to a garbage bag to ensure no leakage. Her spray zone is expanding.

Oh, but there’s more. Sure, at times during feedings our little Baby Rangirl would sneeze or cough as the spoon hits her mouth, causing a light chuckle from either parent as we cleaned the high chair of puréed pears and carrots. But now, the zone has expanded beyond the safety of the chair. Yesterday, I got sweet potatoes in my hair, on my arms, and in 3 spots on my sweats in one feeding.

Oh, and let’s not forget another fail on my part to secure Baby Rangirl’s diaper properly as she pooped all over new sweats of her own. I could have saved the pants according to Mommy Ranman had I treated them within the hour. But my squeamish instincts advised I toss the messy pants into a bag and let someone else deal with them. Cleaning the diaper was hell enough. I’m on the hook as a result by Mommy Ranman- I think I owe the kid new sweats.

Blasted ever-growing-spray-zones.