Ha ha. Superb joke, God…or whichever minion of yours who never seems to carry around an empty bag of irony. What’s next? [sarcasm] Oh boy I just can’t wait [/sarcasm].

Of all the things a man grows up finding oh-so awesome on a woman, I must now be desensitized by traumatic events in order to ignore such stigma. Can’t the Parenting Gods just send me an e-mail?

“Dear Daddy Ranman, no more surprises. Just don’t find anything remotely interesting about women going forward because you now have a daughter. Or else. You’ll walk in on your daughter one day and….well, you fill in the blanks. LOL ROTFL.”

If I got a guarantee like that then it’d be easier. Preferred over the alternative where I’m folding baby clothes and then BLAM-O!

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Yoga pants. For a 10 month old. Now, I grew up enjoying a fine set of yoga pants on a lady as an appreciator of the female gender. Now? My eyes and reproductive system all went into shock thinking that my daughter (as young as TEN MONTHS old) will be sporting said type of pants.

I didn’t even have time to cope with the loss of interest with women in yoga pants. When I see my wife wearing them I might shudder as I recall the image above.

Seriously, what’s next? I’ll find a training bra? Oh how this father gig requires an instruction manual or a “Understanding the World’s Sense of Humor for Dummies” book.