I cannot begin to describe how awkward it is to interact with parents/kids at a playground. I’m not used to it- sure, I’ll network with coworkers and adults if I see a positive net result. Perhaps it’s a future ally in the war against Mr. Pennybottom and his tendency to thwart any internal promotions at Company XYZ.

But RandomMom in a playground or at a barely-known-kid’s party: I need to get to know you over the next few moments of my child’s attention span without making it weird that I’m the only dad there. Awkward? Oh, aye. In addition: trying to find engaging conversational topics with their kid whom I’ve known for exactly 3 seconds? How do I know what another 2 year old knows in terms of vocabulary? My 2 year old and I talk about farts and George Bush Sr. all the time.

Where the heck are all the other dudes who know as little about their child’s last bowel movement as I do? These moms get down to the strain of DNA which predict their daughters’ taste in arts & crafts by staring at a dirty diaper. I just know that Baby Rangirl didn’t crap her pants on my watch as of yet. And I don’t even acknowledge that fact in case the jinx gods hear me and deliver a soiled diaper whilst at a park with no changing tables. Or at a Radio Shack as I try to run out with a now-stolen battery pack in hand.

Yea, that happened.

And with Baby Rangirl’s shortening attention span via all the iPad-parenting we’re allowing, I’m luckily off to different parts of a playground so that we’re not engaging with 1 mom all the time. Although, that short attention span is creating quite the scatter brain…we asked her to help put the groceries away….


Ah, the joys of being a semi-caring dad.